Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Light-Skinned Women And The Black Man

This passage is for the black men who make statements like: “She’s cute for a dark-skinned girl. Nah, man, I can’t date no dark-skinned sista. I’ll take a light-skinned sista over a dark-skinned sista any day. Dark-skinned sistas are ugly. She’d be fine if she was just a little lighter. Dark-skinned women have attitudes.” And the list literally goes on and on.

To the black men that speak so immaturely, foolishly, and ignorantly…Shame on you! How could you fix your mouth to disrespect your black sista like that? Where did you learn to hate the dark-skinned woman? Is it possible that you dislike yourself? Listen up! If you feel like you’re “the man” just because you’re with a lighter skinned girl/woman, I’m here to tell you, you’ve got some self-esteem issues yourself. And for the record: most of the men that prefer a light-skinned girl/woman are dark-skinned themselves. Imagine that! So with that being said, if you’re a dark-skinned brotha, but you can’t and/or won’t date a dark-skinned sista, you CAN’T possibly like yourself or the skin that you’re in. 

Do you realize how silly you look talking down on our women of color? I’ll say it again: Shame on you! You were raised by black women in your family. Mothers, grandmothers, and aunts. And I’m pretty sure that somewhere in your family, you’ve got some dark chocolate. How do you view them? Are THEY ugly to you? 

It’s one thing to have a preference, but it’s a whole other story when you so blatantly disrespect our sistas. Why must you be so ugly! Why must you keep up this garbage? Are you still brainwashed from behavior back in the slavery days? Light-skinned niggers verse the dark-skinned niggers. Yes, I said Niggers, NOT Niggas, because that’s just what we were referred to as. There’s nothing cute about downing our black sistas simply because they have dark skin. If anything, you should respect and cherish our Queens. But then again, I wouldn’t have to tell a real man such a thing, now would I?

Some black men need to grow up! All over social media making themselves look like fools. Why don’t you try educating yourselves on where all of this crap stems from? If you really and truly understood, I would hope that you’d have a change of heart the next time you fix your mouth to speak so negatively about the black woman. Black women are beautiful! Light, mocha, and dark. We are simply beautiful! Yes we are.

Get it together my brothas! You’ve got to do better. We don’t need our own brothas putting us down and talking about us as if we’re NOT good enough. That’s NOT cool and it’s NOT a good look. Why don’t you try standing up for dark-skinned women? Learn to appreciate their beauty. It’s bad enough that dark-skinned women AND men had it REALLY rough back in the day. And to think that our black men are keeping this up in 2016. What a shame! What an embarrassment! What an insult to the black culture as a whole.

Wake up my brothas! Degrading the dark-skinned woman is a negative reflection on YOU. You’re the one with the problem. You’re the one that needs to search within yourself to see what’s really going on in that messed up and confused mind of yours.

Stop downing our sistas because of their skin tone. That’s ridiculous and absolute nonsense.

In closing: Ask yourself

Why do I prefer light-skinned women over dark-skinned women? And please, don’t be so quick to answer that question. Really give it some thought. Is your answer that of a juvenile or a mature man with substance?

I’ll leave you with this: Why sell yourself short by choosing a woman based on what she looks like? 9 times out of 10, you’ll be sadly disappointed by who you chose because you just had to have what you call “the baddest chick.” A woman is much more than her body and looks. I get it! You want somebody who looks good, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. But where you mess up is choosing a woman solely based on looks. Why do you think so many men get played and/or hurt? They get so caught up trying to hook up with who has the fattest ass, hips, and thighs, that they can’t even see clearly what this female is really about. I’ll say it again: Looks are far too overrated, and I can say that confidently.

You’ll know when you’ve matured as a man when you clearly understand that just because a woman is light-skinned it does NOT make her the better pick. Don’t be so simple-minded. Try choosing a woman based on who she is. Things like personality, character, confidence, independence, etc. Choosing a woman based on looks alone can get you caught up, trust me!

And keep it real brothas, if you’re a dark-skinned male yourself, you know firsthand what these dark-skinned sistas feel like. Think! 

Written by Stephanie Lahart (California Author & Poet)