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to yourself: “I didn't sign up for this shit!” Married, but feeling lonely.
Married, but thinking about cheating. Married, but dealing with more than your fair share of everyday
life situations. In your marriage vows, you promised to love your spouse for
better or for worse, but sometimes it’s much
easier said than done, right?
have their challenges, some bigger than others. For some odd reason, when we
get married, we think that our lives are going to be this perfect union until reality shows us something different. In the
midst of working, going to school, taking care of the kids, trying to please
our spouses, and handling all of the responsibilities of home life, things can
get extremely overwhelming AND
sometimes we feel like we've lost all control. Unfortunately, when we
experience pressure that we’re not used to, our attitude, behavior, and the way
we think can be all over the place. Our emotions tend to get the best of us.
As humans, we
can sometimes be selfish without even realizing that we’re doing it. It’s all
about OUR wants and OUR needs. But have you ever stopped to think about what
your spouse is going through, too? Although you’re married, you have to
remember that you’re both individual people. You both have your own personal challenges and struggles. It’s life!
Nobody’s exempt from issues.
Like reading a
good fiction, romance novel, cheating takes you to a place where you feel fulfilled,
even if it’s temporary. For that period of time you feel free! Free from the
realities of the real world. That leads me to what I would like to talk about
Loneliness and Cheating in Your
feeling lonely, huh? I get it! Your spouse isn't showing you the attention that
you desire. Your spouse isn't spending enough time with you. Your spouse doesn't make love to you the way that they used to. Your spouse is SO busy that
they miss out on the things that are TRULY important to you. Your spouse just doesn't seem to be interested in you like they used to be. You just don’t feel
appreciated, and communication is nonexistent. And when you DO try to talk, it
just ends up in a heated argument over the smallest things.
With all of this
“stuff” going on in your life, temptation is having its way with you. You’re
tempted to do some things that you know aren't right. But what the hell, right?
You’re sick of this crap and you need a break from it all.
Let Me Ask You a Question
Have you even
tried to communicate your feelings and thoughts to your spouse? Do they know
what and how you’re feeling and/or thinking about? Listen, if you don’t communicate
what you’re feeling, it’s not fair to your mate. It’s just not! If you want
something from your mate, you have the responsibility to do your part. Open your
mouth and speak up! You can’t expect your mate to know what’s going on in that
mind of yours if you don’t say anything.
No matter how difficult or painful it may be,
you have to talk about it. Communication can save a relationship from going
down a road of pain, hurt, regret, anger, and betrayal. If you’re feeling
lonely, communicate that to your partner. Set aside some quiet time where there
won’t be any distractions. Make sure that you have their full attention, keep eye contact, and ensure that they fully understand the feelings that
you’re experiencing. Don’t down play what you’re feeling. Your mate needs to
know that you need more of them. Whether it is more time, sex, attention, etc… it needs to be brought
to the table.
Seeking Comfort Elsewhere Won’t Solve
Don’t get caught
up! Temporary pleasure can turn out to be your worst nightmare. Don’t become a
victim simply because you want to feel good for the moment. You may find
yourself in a situation that you never saw coming. What you thought was
temporary, is now YOUR secret. Irresponsible choices can cost you big time!
Think it Through
Could you REALLY live with yourself if you cheated
on your partner?
Would it be
worth losing the person that you know you love and care about? Would it be worth
possibly losing your family? Would it be worth destroying his/her trust in you?
Would it be worth having to start all over again with someone who doesn't even
compare to your current spouse? Would it be worth it to see those tears in his/her
eyes? Would it be worth seeing the pain that you've caused on his/her face?
Would it be worth it to destroy everything
that you've both built together? Would it be worth it to break their heart over
your selfishness and weakness? Would it be worth it to betray the man or woman that
you promised to be faithful to? Or furthermore, would you be able to forgive
yourself, if you gave your spouse an STD? Always remember this: When you decide
to cheat, you’re taking a huge risk. A risk that could turn your life upside
Some things just aren't worth it. Think! Think about what your choices could do to you, your partner, and maybe even your family. I encourage you to be mature enough to
make the right choices. The wrong choices can literally ruin your life, and to
me, ruining your life over a quick fix is just NOT worth it! Not at all.